Rules, consequences, and modifications are all critical, but they’ll only work if you’re effectively communicating with the student.
This goes back to the tight-rope: you must be firm and consistent while remaining kind and positive. You may need to repeat your expectations often, and even have the student repeat them back to you. In this way, you guarantee that the student both agrees to and understands what is required.
A common problem in the classroom is the dreaded Power Struggle. Students with ADHD often become frustrated, which leads to resistance and disruptive behavior. When this happens, teachers often succumb to their own frustration, and may yell, punish, or send the child to the principle’s office. This unfortunately does not improve anything. In fact, quite the opposite. If you allow the situation to escalate, and start butting heads with the student, you lessen your ability to encourage positive growth in the future. The student will be more guarded and resentful, and behaviors will probably worsen.
The key to avoiding power struggles is to remain calm, disengage, and, above all, respond with patient firmness. Power struggles pit you against your student; you become opponents, when in fact you should be on the same team. If and when a student engages in negative, disruptive behavior, do not become emotionally reactive. This is critically important: you are modeling behavior. If you engage in the struggle and use power, anger, or intimidation, you are teaching a lesson you really don’t want to be teaching. It is not easy. It requires a great deal of emotional strength and control, but it is crucial.
When the student becomes disruptive or defiant, don’t stop the class to engage the student. The student is seeking attention; if you give that attention, the student will be reinforced and will be more likely to engage in the negative behavior in the future. Also, it’s humiliating to be reprimanded in front of the whole class. Instead, get the rest of the class to keep working, and bring the student out into the hallway for a brief, one-on-one conversation. Be understanding and kind in your choice of words. For instance, “I understand why you’re frustrated, let’s work together to solve this problem…” etc. Remember, you are modeling behavior. Model calmness, and the student will pick up on it.
Sometimes immediate response is necessary. When this is the case, don’t respond with anger or frustration. A calm, matter-of-fact statement is best, like, “That’s not an appropriate comment. Let’s keep working, and we’ll talk about it later.”
The way you communicate is as important as what you communicate. Anger and frustration will only make the classroom problems worse.